Andrea's List of Qualities a Boyfriend Must Have

/* He must be able to understand the geek references and basic C++ syntax contained in the following list and see the humor in it despite the obvious programming errors (e.g. undeclared identifiers, syntax problems, etc.) */

#include<iostream>
#include<near.impossible.female.standards>
#include<not.really>

int calc, t, dating, marriage, brain_RAM, brain_HDD;
double Height, Age, my_Age;

int main( ) {

1. He must be able to handle calculus of multivariable in brain_RAM; //bonus hotness if he can do differential equations
2. be able to recall the molecular masses of hydrogen through oxygen from brain_HDD;
3. and be able to calculate the distance x a cannonball will land given the force it was shot with, length of cannon, angle shot from, and height of cannon from the ground.;
   
   
4. He must have taken college-level courses from psychology or philosophy (and have Asian-acceptable grades in them);
5. be able to sustain Socratic conversations about ( books || ideas || current_events ) for t >= 0.5; // t is in hours
6. and play a musical instrument.; //extra sexy kudos if he can sing
   
   
7. He must be athletic or very active;
8. agree that for (int dating = 0; dating < marriage; dating++) {
   cout << "No sex.";
   }; // if this were a RL program, it would be more complicated.
   cout << woohoo; //And it wouldn't be an infinite loop.
9. be consistent with his moral+ethical values and spiritual beliefs.;
   
   
10. (double) Height > (double) 1.6; //meters
11. (double) Age >= (double) my_Age;
12. He must be my Part-Time Lover and Full-Time Friend; // <3
13. He must be a foodie BUT ( != obese && != fat ) ;
14. He must recognize the value of the Mark Twain maxims: "Sing like no one's listening, love like you've never been hurt, dance like no one's watching, and live like it's heaven on earth.";
    

}

P.S. I will probably rewrite this to my satisfaction someday when I have time to be more clever. Which will probably be never.
P.P.S. I don't like having to write in HTML entities.
P.P.P.S. I've only learned two weeks worth of C++, so gimme a break, yeah?