In all this order, there is confusion

Note: These thoughts aren't really well-developed in any way. I just haven't updated in a while.

Thermodynamics proposed the concept of entropy and how everything has the tendency towards disorder. The second law of thermodynamics is the reason there is a direction of time. Because we recognize nature's initial state to the next more disordered state.

But what if what we realize as order is not really order at all? Not "ultimate order" at least. What if there was a bigger picture that humans are building against, just to fulfill our concept of order? Who knows what this ultimate order is.... ultimate and absolute truth, do you really believe in such a thing?

Recently, I've been so busy, I don't really have time to think about the world at large or spiritual issues. High school provided so much ample time for such thinking and self-cultivation via literature and writing and churchgoing. What's at my university desk is a jumble of coursework and research investigations and preparations for a future career. But I guess that's the job of a scientist, isn't it? To dwell on the minute details of how nature works. And then we let the businessmen and politicians manipulate it.

Anyway, I'm just confused, I guess. About the balance, or lack thereof, in my life.